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Attorney
A person who is authorized to act formally for another person. The two most common ways you'll hear this word used is for an attorney-at-law and a power-of-attorney. Attorneys-at-Law are lawyers, who are specially licensed and trained. A power-of-attorney is a trusted person you have authorized in a special way to handle selected business and personal affairs for you.
Question: attorney !!!!!!!!!!? These are from a book called "Disorder in the American Courts", and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.
ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan!
_________________________
ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
_________________________
ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
_________________________
ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
_________________________
ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
WITNESS: We both do.
ATTORNEY: Voodoo?
WITNESS: We do.
ATTORNEY: You do?
WITNESS: Yes, voodoo.
_________________________
ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
_________________________
ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty.
_________________________
ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you shittin' me?
_________________________
ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Uh.... I was gettin' laid!
_________________________
ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Are you shittin' me? Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?
_________________________
ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Now whose death do you suppose terminated it?
_________________________
ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Guess.
_________________________
ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
_________________________
ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people. Would you like to rephrase that?
_________________________
ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
WITNESS: Oral.
_________________________
ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him!
_________________________
ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Huh....are you qualified to ask that question?
_________________________
ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.
Answer: good one.....excellent
very funny ..... loved it .....gave me a good laugh
.....good job.....keep up the good ones
Question: Attorney ??? As a Attorney, how many years of law school would you have to complete and have anyone heard of a Malpractice Attorney ??? What is their Career ???
Answer: I've been an attorney for more than eighteen years; so my advice might be based on outdated information. When I was researching law schools to determine which to attend, there were a couple which did not absolutely require applicants to have bachelor's degrees.
One might be able to complete law school in two and one-half years by attending summer school; however, I recommend not doing that unless you have a very special and overriding need to finish law school as quickly as possible. In all likelihood, you will benefit more by working in the law during the summer rather than attending summer school.
It is not absolutely necessary to attend or graduate from law school. There are a couple of states, one of which is Washington, which have clerkship programs: one trains to be an attorney by apprenticing ones self to a judge or practicing attorney. The downside is that you might not be able to practice law in a state which doesn't have a clerkship program because such states require graduation from an A.B.A. accredited law school for admission to the bar.
There are many malpractice attorneys. They practice in the area of professional malpractice. Probably most of them practice in medical malpractice, suing or defending physicians; however, there are many who also practice in legal malpractice, suing or defending attorneys.
Question: How does attorney fees work for non criminal matters? I asked this question in a different way, and I neglected to explain that it's not a law suit case, so 'contingency' is probably not an option.
My question is: If a potential client doesn't have the entire retainers fee up front for an attorney, is there a way that an attorney can start representing the client with some sort of a guarantee that he/she will be paid? Is there a form of written agreement that can be drawn up between the attorney and the potential client?
Answer: An attorney is free to draw up a contract that allows for a certain amount down and certain amounts to be paid at various intervals. Some attorneys will do this with certain types of matters.
It is virtually never done in bankruptcy cases and it is reluctantly done in cases involving the courts as there is no guarantee that the attorney will be allowed to exit the case should the client not pay.
Question: How quickly do attorney fees accrue on a property that has gone into foreclosure? I am working on a property that is in foreclosure in WA state. It is 2 months into the process, $11,500 in back payments and taxes and a few thousand in attorney fees for the mortgage holder's attorneys. Is there a ballpark estimate of how much attorney fees will be once the 135 days is up and it goes to sale, and is there any formula for calculating the rate of their charges?
Answer: HUD prescribes the attorney fees for a foreclosure. Even if the property is not a HUD property, most foreclosure attorneys bill by HUD guidelines. In NJ where I was involved in foreclosures, atty. fees were $1,200.00 per file. That does not take into account expenses, which can be many times that amount. There is title work, securing the property, taxes, accrued interest etc. which can add significantly to the mortgaged amount.
For the specific amount in your case, just look at another judgment from the attorney involved in your foreclosure. They usually bill the same fee on all files if they work in volume.
Good luck, I hope this helps.
Question: Where can I find an attorney that specializes in indigent criminal defense? I have a friend who is being wrongly accused of something he hasn't done, and is currently incarcerated behind it. The court appointted attorney that he has, does not have his best interest in mind. The attorney met with my friend once in the last 3 or 4 months and when my friend's family inquire about the case the attorney gives them the run around. My friend and his family can't afford an attorney, so they have pretty much given up hope of him ever coming home. So if there is anyone who knows anyone willing to help my friend, please let me know. Any info or help would be grately appreciated.
Answer: There aren't criminal attorneys that will take a pro-bono case when there are public defenders to do it.
It isn't that the court appointed doesn't have your friend's interest in mind, it is that he has 100 or more other cases, and has to deal with them on the days they come up in court.
There is nothing going on with your friend's case - the family will have to wait until the court dates, like everyone else who can't afford an attorney that can hold their hand.
If he truly is innocent - it will come out in trial.
Harsh reality,and I'm sorry to have to tell you it. Your friend is going to have to reevaluate his life and his friends so that when he does get out, he stays away from the life that has led him to be in the position he is in.
Question: What happens to an attorney if negligence is found in a grievance complaint? What happens to the attorney, will I get some sort of reimbursement for fees paid to the attorney, I have filed a grievance and the attorney was found neglible. What happens now?
The attorney grievance committee said that my attorney was with out a doubt negligent.
My attorney also contacted me and asked me to withdraw the complaint, which the grievance committee said makes mine a "hotter " case.
Answer: The attorney could get fined, sanctioned, suspended and/or lose their license to practice law -- depending on the severity.
Do you mean "negligible" (as in not significantly at fault) or "negligent" (meaning, at fault)?
Question: How do i find a good attorney for labor and employment, wrongful termination in houston Texas? This is the first time i decide to hire an attorney to handle my case. I wanna know if there are websites for local attorneys rating? or some other sources can help find a good attorney. Or any tips to deal with attorneys??
Thanks
Btw, it is not exactly a "wrongful termination" i was forced to worked clock off, given no lunch break during long hours. I reported it to district manager, later i was terminated.
they just thought i am troubled,and afraid about i would tell other employees to do the same thing.
Answer: go to the texas state bar website. but you have about a 1/1,000% chance on winning a wrongfuf termination lawsuit in Texas. Unless they actually said you were fired due to your race, religion, sex, age or national origin you have no case.
Oh yea, you have 180 days to file a claim with the eeoc & texas workforce comission
http://www.twc.state.tx.us/customers/jse…
http://www.eeoc.gov/
Question: What to include in the letter to fire attorney? I need my file and remaining money in attorney's client trust account that belong to me.
1. What should I include in my letter to fire attorney?
2. Should I tell him why I am firing him?
If he doesn't send my file and I hire a new attorney to get the file and money, can ex-attorney be realiable for the cost (fee)
because he did not send file by the dateline?
3. Once attorney is fired, does that mean he can not work on my case from date by law? because I don't want him to anymore.
Answer: Say something like this.
As of this date____ i no longer need or want your services. Pleas mail me my files i gave to you as soon as possible or may i come by and pick them up.
Thank you,___
Once you fire him on certain date he cannot work for you nor bill you for later work,etc
If he does not give you your file within a date given by you in writing your new lawyer can sue him for added money cost to you.
Question: What to do when an attorney removes themselves from a case? What is the client to do when an attorney withdraws their services from the case? How long do they have to find a replacement?
It is a civil case where custody is involved. Plaintiff's Attorney removed themselves stating it caused her (the attorney) a financial hardship because their client wanted to deal directly with the defendent (child's father) instead of going through her.
Answer: What is the use of having an attorney if the person is trying to do it themselves. It has said only a fool represents themselves (in legal proceedings). Either let the lawyer deal with it or deal with it out of court. If you are willing to let the lawyer deal with it then get another one and do so.
If the two agree to try to work it out together (without lawyers - an agreement between two parents that love their child) then do so....it will make the life of the child easier than going through this...if this can't be done then the lawyer and legal action maybe the route to take.
Question: Can a company attorney give legal advice if the owner/supervisor is not an attorney? Our work union is represented by a company whose owner and direct supervisor is not an attorney. The supervisor has attorney's working under them. SInce the supervisor is not an attorney is it legal for those attorney's to give our group legal advice?
Answer: Ask that lawyer.
There are tons of rules on what corporate counsel can and cannot do and who they do and do not represent and it isn't clear from what you've said that this person is corporate counsel, as opposed to an employee who happens to have a law license. But lawyers are required to tell you whether or not they can give you legal advice, so go ahead and ask.
Question: What is the best type of attorney to contact to talk about student loan debt? What is the best type of attorney to contact about student loan debt? Bankruptcy lawyers seem to cringe/avoid this because student loans are currently exempt from bankruptcy.
Is there any in the US that take this stuff serious and can help broke former students?
I mean there has to be some attorneys that now have experience in these matters since the economy is now becoming flooded with unemployed new attorneys.
Answer: Struggling with debt often leads to depression, anxiety and stress and can cause tension or arguments between you and your loved ones. It can be a very difficult time for people, and if it is not dealt with, can lead to some dire consequences. No one intends to get into the downward cycle of debt, and for many it can be be slow decent of borrowing just to make ends meet. Before you tackle debt and the cause of debt, here are a few things to consider.
Before you can tackle your debt and the associated worry and stress, you need to accept that it’s a problem. For many people, debt is something that creeps up on them, building up slowly over time. Your debt may have grown from being small and manageable into something that now feels like it’s totally out of your control, but now you need to accept that your debt is a problem. After you accept this, then you can now begin to tackle it.
Once you have accepted that your debt is a problem, it’s important that you talk to someone about it. By talking about your problem you share the burden of worry and help to reduce feelings of stress. Be open with your partner about your debt, it affects them too – both financially and emotionally. If you feel comfortable, talk to friends or family about your debt, but don’t worry if you feel like you can’t – it can be a difficult subject to bring up. The most important thing is to ensure you get professional debt advice from a debt counsellor who will hear you out and help you to deal with your situation.
The sooner you start dealing with your debt, the sooner the problem will be resolved. Your first steps should be:
* Get in touch with a debt organisation like the Citizen’s Advice Bureau or CCCS for free impartial advice.
* Stop ignoring bills and start speaking to your creditors – tell them that you are having problems, and that you are working to try and find a way through it. They will listen to your situation and advise you what you can do. Many will try and help you find a way to help you by reducing interest, change the term of loans and see the best way forward. Remember – it’s in their interests to help you pay them back.
Taking action also has the benefit of giving you a feeling of achievement, and you’ll soon start to see that your debt is a problem that you can overcome. So if you’re feeling as though your debt is a huge problem, or something you can’t deal with, remember that taking small steps will help to restore your confidence.
There are many different routes out of debt, and a few charities that can help you decide which option is best for you. the ones below won’t charge you for advice.
* National Debtline
* Consumer Credit Counselling Service
* Credit Action
* Citizens Advice Bureau
If you’ve been suffering with growing debts, you may also have felt some degree of stress, anxiety or even depression. The worries associated with being in debt are very natural and very common.
There are simple steps you can take to help you relax. It’s also important to remember that your debt is a problem that you will overcome, and that if you take action now, in a few years’ time your debt will seem like a distant memory.
Remember to:
* Eat well. A healthy, balanced diet will help your mind and body function.
* Exercise. Run around the park, hop on a bike – exercise doesn’t have to be expensive.
* Sleep. A good diet and regular exercise will help you sleep.
* Keep it all in perspective. Your debt is a problem that you are dealing with.
Your debt may be linked to your emotional or psychological needs. For many people, spending money is a way to boost their mood, to reward themselves or to make up for disappointments. For others, debt and depression become very connected, with debt fuelling depression which in turn fuels a desire to spend. For some, shopping is an addiction, which can be as difficult to stop as drinking alcohol or taking drugs.
If you know that your spending habits are affected by your emotional or psychological state, you may want to seek counselling. Speak to your GP, who may refer you to a counsellor.
Debt is a problem that you can solve. By taking the first steps towards tackling your debt, you will begin to feel less stressed and more in control. As your debt becomes manageable, remember to take care of yourself by eating well and exercising regularly. It may also be necessary to address the emotional or psychological scars of debt – but help is available.
Whatever your situation, remember that debt is just a problem that needs to be dealt with. You can and will overcome it, and come through the experience better.
Question: What is the typical attorney fees for helping buy a small biz? I am purchasing a salon and I need to hire an attorney. The attorney said he wants $3500 to do the business formation, register the LLC, sales contract, and establish the tax laibilities, etc. He basically said that fee will include everything. He said he would charge about $2000 for services except forming the LLC and registration etc. Please give me some figures based on experience.
Answer: like ten buckos
Question: Can an attorney act as the notary on a document the attorney creates? For example, can an attorney notarize a living will made for a client? I know notaries cannot be a party to the contract, will, etc., but the attorney is merely drafting the document.
So, can an attorney be the notary on a document he drafts for a client?
Answer: Sure, as long as they aren't a signatory to the document and are a registered notary public in their state.
Question: How much does a medical malpractice attorney in CA make on average? I know I want to go to law school after I get my bachelor's, but I'm still undecided as to what branch of law I'm going to study. Right about now, I've got it narrowed down to corporate attorney, prosecuting attorney, and medical malpractice attorney.
So I'm curious as to what they make, even if it's just an average or frame.
Answer: Stay away from medical malpractice. The insurance industry successfully lobbied congress to cap medical malpractice lawsuits in order to limit their costs. Lawyers don't make much money in that field anymore.
This is actually one of the few moves by insurance lobbyists I agree with.
Question: How long can an attorney have to produce a will? My husband passed away on May 28th, 2010. His mother's attorney has claimed there's a will of which I am unaware. It has been over a month since the attorney made that claim and he has yet to produce the purported will. There's a personal injury settlement check in limbo awaiting the materialization of this so-called will. How long does someone have to produce a will?
Answer: If there is no will, entitlement becomes Intestate. I'm drawing a blank if the wife has rights over the mother though.
Question: Can I bring legal action to an attorney that promised to help me with credit repair, and has bounced? I paid $300 to an attorney that works with a real estate firm specializing in credit repair, by disputing and of such nature. He hasn't done anything, he is now unable to be reached? Took my money and left but still around. Can I bring legal action to him? (His company states that he's doing it on his own). I need a good attorney to help me out, what kind of attorney could help me in this case? Please help me.
Answer: Report him to the bar association. They will do a full investigation into his misconduct and discipline him. It shouldn't cost you anything. Google the bar association in your state to find the info you need. Good luck!
Question: How do I fire my attorney that is being paid on a contingency basis? I feel that I prematurely hired legal representation. I am not willing to sue and have received some payment for my legal claim, of which I have paid my attorney $30,000+. I can manage the process on my own. How do I/ can I fire my attorney?
Answer: Read your fee agreement/contract. That is the ONLY answer to this question. I have seen some clever and very legal contingency fee agreements. Many times, you cannot simply fire the attorney. Well, you can, but you will still owe 33.3% (or however much you agreed to) of any settlement to the attorney. If it isn't worded that way, you can very possible be held in breach and sued for the "at-cost" of the legal fees. Meaning, the attorney can hand you a bill when you walk out the door for his/her legal work at their normal hourly rate.
The best thing is to sit down and read the consequences of breaking the agreement or arrange a sit down and discuss your need for an attorney with the attorney.
Question: can an attorney volunteer to represent someone who is mentally unable to seek an attorney? If an attorney is aware that a brain-dead person has been victimized in some way, can that attorney take initiative and represent that person even though not requested to do so? This is purely academic so feel free to be creative with the question and any related variables.
I guess what I'm really asking is how to assert this ability in court if the defenese were to object. Is there a statute or case law to reference?
Answer: No. What you're describing is called "champerty and maintenance," in which a lawyer who has no legal interest in a case brings it anyway.
The case would be dismissed, and the lawyer would be subject to disbarment.
If the family will not take steps, that reflects the family's decision to do nothing. Besides, if the patient is brain dead, then there is no client to represent.
Question: How can I find an attorney specializing in internet defamation and libel to write a cease and desist letter? How can I find an attorney specializing in internet defamation and libel to write a cease and desist letter?
How can I find an attorney specializing in internet defamation and libel to write a cease and desist letter to a company located in Massachusetts. The material posted on line about me and my company is libel per se.
Answer: Contact the Bar Association in your city and ask for a referral to a libel lawyer. "Internet defamation" is pretty highly specialized, it's not likely you'll find a lawyer who specializes strictly in internet-based cases, but a good libel attorney in general should be able to help you. If you don't know if there is a Bar Association in your area, start with the American Bar Association at http://www.abanet.org/.
Question: How to find a good attorney specializing in age discrimination? I am being dismissed from my company. I think their reason is a combination of being female and being 50 years old. Any suggestions of how to find a really good attorney, are appreciated. An attorney that will give it to me straight. If I don't have a case that is okay, I am not trying to make something from nothing but I think what is happening to me deserves consultation. Thank you
Answer: Yeah, Thats a tough situation.. I would recommend trying sites like the one below. They have reviews for the atorneys which might be helpful. Anyways, good luck with that!
http://www.socalattorneyfinder.com
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