Domestic Adoption

Question: Domestic adoption? Okay, origanally I thought I wanted to adopt internationally but the more I think about it, domestic adoption seems to have a lot of perks. If you have adopted, please feel free to share any stories. Also, what is the average waiting time to adopt a 0-6 month old baby of Latina race, African-American race, or a mixed race baby?

Answer: I think both adopting domestically and internationally is a great thing to do but you need to think about if the child you are adopting internationally has cultural beliefs or a religion that doesnt agree with what you believe yourself. Good luck with the new child! God bless you!

Question: Does anyone know of any airlines that offer domestic adoption fares? Hi-I am adopting a child from Nebraska but live in Pennsylvania. All the information I've found about adoption fares have to do with international flights. Does anyone know of any airlines that offer adoption fares for domestic flights? Thanks for your help!!

Answer: Call the air lines you are taking and ask them that same question. Or submit it to several airline's and you will find one that needs good publicity/

Question: Do airlines offer discounts for domestic adoption travel? I know airlines offer discounts for international adoptions. however we're in the process of a domestic (US) adoption and will have to travel at the last minute once we hear the birthmother is in labor. Thanks for any information.

Answer: No, that would be thoughful -- not likely something airlines would be :) Some airlines still offer an open ticket, you should contact the few top airlines, explain your situation and see what they can offer. If you have the EDD of the birthmother you may be able to get the ticket for that week, then ask the airlines if it can be changed due to the situation. Good luck and congrats !!!

Question: My husband and I want to adopt a baby girl, we have 2 kids already, the youngest is 2. Domestic adoption? Is a domestic adoption possible, and is it ok if our other kids are bio children? Their ages are 2 and 9, and we want more children but we would rather give a home to a baby who needs it than have more kids. Is this possible for a domestic adoption, in the US? I just wanted to add, we don't care if it's a girl or not, I've just been thinking along those lines because our other kids are girls and the two youngest will share a room! It doesn't really matter what sex it is though.

Answer: Go ahead and make more babies, because there are more families trying to adopt babies than there are babies availible. I believe it is especially difficult to be an adoptee in a family with bio children, it really makes it apparent how you have different genes. It sucks growing up not looking like anyone, acting, talking or thinking like anyone else - especially your adoptive family. Raising a stranger's child is a different ball game all together. While you may be able to love another's child "as your own" there is no garuntee that baby will be able to feel your love, as the grief of losing one's mother and connection to family is so deep and strong. Do you think it would be easy to sign away your parental rights to one of your children? Do you imagine it's easy for someone who is in a vulnerable position that makes them feel unable to raise their child? Do you want to be a party to such separation?

Question: A few international and domestic adoption questions? in US domestic adoption do both parents need to be citizens? my husband will have his green card, but not be a citizen for about 3 more years (he's Welsh). And internationally is there a minimal age for adopting out of Russia? Which would you suggest? International or Domestic? Any answers will be appreciated just please do not rant about how we should "take care of our own people first". Please? I don't need to hear that, keep it to yourself.

Answer: this is not a rant. US foster care, please. adoption is supposed to be about kids who NEED homes.

Question: How long does an Domestic adoption take? My husband and I have been waiting for our adotion agency to call us with some news on the adoption. It has been only 5 months since all the paper work and home study are completed. I guess this is for other adoptive parent how long did you have to wait for a child? What did you do to keep your mind off the wait?

Answer: the only answer is " it varies" We took only seven months from our first contact with our son's mother to placement, and pushed through all the paperwork and homestudy in that time. One of the couples in our "adoption education" class had been on the waiting list for seven years, and was renewing their homestudy again.

Question: how many hours does a lawyer take for the average domestic adoption? we want to get an estimate of how many hours we will be billed if we pay by the hour. Birth father is willing to sign papers, no Indian heritage, pretty easy adoption.

Answer: This question cannot be answered by anyone other than your lawyer. These things are all different, and lawyers all have different rates. Adoption isn't, nor should it be, cheap and/or easy.

Question: How much does a domestic adoption cost? I have 2 questions..... 1. How much does the avg adoption cost? 2. What are the financial requirements...in $$ that you must have to adopt a child?

Answer: Foster care, depending on the route you go, can be anywhere from free to several thousand dollars. If you go through a Foster Care agency, it'll be more expensive (we've seen $450 for the home study up to $8000 for... who knows). Private adoptions through a lawyer are usually $4000 - $10,000, but that's a rough estimate. They can be more. Agency/Facilitator adoptions can be from $12,000 to $50,000 (seriously). There are non-profit agencies that have sliding scales for fees based on income, although some simply have low fees. There are some that charge $12,000 just for the 'privilege' of working with them, then the cost of the adoption/First Mother support. Sometimes you'll have dual agency fees (those are the mucho-expensive ones). Once, we got presented with a situation, and the fees were $15,000 but the First Mother support was another $15,000 (every situation we've been presented with has included First Mother support up front - we have never offered to pay, it's always been requested of us, and ranged from $1000 total to, like I said, $15,000). These fees generally do not include travel or finalization - travel is usually to another state and requires you to stay 10-14 days, so the cost varies, and finalization is usually around $1K. Financial requirements are that you can adequately provide for a child. You do have to submit a financial statement and proof of income as part of your homestudy, but I don't recall anything saying you had to make "this" much money per year.

Question: What are the difficulties in domestic adoption? I'm asking this question for a research paper I'm doing for my dual credit language arts class. Please answer with real answers. Thanks.

Answer: you have to pass a background check, and be able to financially, and emotionally be deemed fit to care for the child. You also have to have the space they will need. Another thing to try would be to call an adoption agency to ask them.

Question: When adopting a newborn through domestic adoption can you specify the gender or race? Just wondering. Thanks. wondering how it compares to international adoption because some foreign countries let you choose the gender.

Answer: In Domestic newborn adoption it is legal to specify your preferred race and gender as well as decline any "match", for whatever reason. This may, however, be against some agencies policies. With international adoptions some countries allow you to specify your preferences, others don't. Some will let you review multiple children's files, some refer a specific child only.

Question: What are the pros and cons of international vs domestic adoption? My husband and I are looking to adopt and we don't know where to start.

Answer: Well, if you have to adopt, do it domestically. My answer won't earn me any fans from adoptive parents on this board, but I answer from a place of honesty since I am an international adoptee. I am 22. I was born in Korea and "abandoned" (which is something agencies make up to make children more adoptable) and then adopted by a white family in the United States. I don't know whether my family was just uneducated on adoption or if they just honestly believed that love was colorblind, but they were not at all sure how to raise a transracial adoptee. I lost a culture, a country, a language, and a nationality on top of the huge loss of my natural family. I also experienced feeling alienated, alone, and like an outcast most of my life due to being a different race than almost everyone around me. I also deal every day with the grave reality that I may never be able to find my natural family since international adoption agencies make it almost impossible for me to do so. My birthdate is fake, so is the name I was given by the orphanage. I may as well have no past, or no genes at all. I would not go lightly into international adoption. The system as it is is extremely corrupt. Countries like Korea may SEEM like they are abiding by international conventions, but they are underhanded and dirty, treating children like commodities and prospective parents like cash cows.

Question: What kinds of loans are available for domestic adoption? We have a balance of approximately $22K. Is there a low interest option for securing this loan amount, or do you just have to put it on your credit card? We don't have much home equity as we purchased the home last year, so I don't think that route would work... not sure. TIA for the answers. I'm not getting a loan to pay for their diapers and formula, I'm getting a loan to pay the adoption agency their fee. Not too many parents have 30 thousand bucks lying around.

Answer: Are you asking if there are loans available specifically to pay for a domestic adoption? Wow, I'd bet a lot of parents would love a loan to pay for their kids! Like they tell those who have them biologically, if you can't afford them, you shouldn't have them. eta: Adoption is A-OK! (Alisa) -- I'm so sorry to hear that you had a bad adoption experience in being raised by mean, greedy and financially lacking ("hardly" rich) parents. eta: I'm perfectly aware that the loan is for agency fees and such.

Question: What is the best method for domestic adoption? Wife and i new to process and in the beginning stages . . . wanting to hear from people who have done or are doing the same??

Answer: Foster-to-adopt is the best method.

Question: Can anyone name any reasons for international vs. domestic adoption? i was reading an article on the increased difficulty of international adoption, and i believe that their are available domestic adoptions, so why go international?

Answer: ~~I think everyone has their own reasons for choosing the method of adoption they choose. I am Biased in my Answer only because we chose to adopt children from foster care. I have been hanging around the Internet on forums and other places that talk about adoption for years now and I know that there are some very honest and positive reasons people choose international adoption and there are some I know are viewed less positive. As one answer has already pointed out many people see the Children of the World as "domestic" in their personal views. International Adoption became "something" for Americans as the Vietnam War came to an end and the tragedy that took place with one of the Airplanes that crashed carrying orphans to the USA. As citizens of an unpopular war many Americans felt the other airlifted orphans should at least have a chance to be adopted and raised in a safe family. Things really took off during the 1980s with Romaina and later when the USSR became Russia and all the other countries they have become. Back then I think the majority of people who Jumped in to adopt children from the former USSR regions were more like today's foster child adoptive parents. We saw great need and children in horrific situations and--if we are talking about America--we saw a way we thought we could help and make a difference in the World. After the years of the cold war there were some who felt it was an honor and an obligation to care about the children of our former enemy. I believe things started to change as it became popular to adopt internationally. The more America wanted to help the more organized and business like things became--the more streamlined--the more accessible...and the more possible for fraud and other issues everyone wanted to ignore. Several years back (maybe 5-6) things were in high gear--and there was an unbelievable number of families adopting internationally. The Media was in full-hype mode about the issues in China and Guatemala and there was a whole new generation of Adoptive Parents who weren't even born when Vietnam ended. While still motivated in many cases by the desire to help children all over the world--there were other things starting to be touted as Why. Not many years ago it would be common to hear people interested in adopting internationally make statements about their motivations which didn't really seem like a great reason. One that I recall most upsetting to me was the potential adoptive parents who stated they wanted to adopt from another country so--the baby's biological family would be harder to find and far away. It was actually considered to be an acceptable reason on some adoption forums to choose International IF you just didn't want any kind of Open Adoption or contact... Just makes that whole problem go away--ya know! [eweu]

Question: Are domestic infant adoption disruptions common? Hello everyone! I am considering domestic infant adoption. I was just wondering how common disruptred or "failed" adoptions are in which the birth parent(s) change their mind. Do most families go through one or two before they are matched with their son or daughter? I have been doing so much research to try and get a rough idea as to how common it is but I have not been successful. Thanks so much!

Answer: Hi Shannobananno, You will not find the exact number of parents who decide to parent their children after earlier considering adoption at some point. Remember, it's a GOOD thing when children get to remain within their own families. To answer your question, I would guess the rate is as high as the number of PAP's or AP's who think they want to adopt and then later return the child, before or after finalization, because it's not what they wanted after all. If you are certain you want to adopt and it's a real concern for you that it finalizes, then I would recommend only considering children who are already legally free for adoption in the first place. You will find them in foster care. Contact your state's department for more information. The rates are 0% of parents later changing their minds & parenting their own children after their parental rights have already been terminated. Just please don't be one of those AP's who commit to a child, then change their minds & disrupt the adoption. Devastating for the children & that's who adoption is really about, right? Good luck. julie j reunited adult adoptee

Question: Is anyone familiar with independent domestic adoption in NC? My husband and I are looking to adopt domestically. We would desire a sibling group and are open to special needs however we do not want to be foster parents. We want to adopt.

Answer: I wish I could send you a hug! Please see this website for more information about NC's waiting children: http://www.adoptuskids.org/states/nc/ind… I wish you all the very best.

Question: Why is Domestic Adoption so difficult? Not meaning to be senseless but, Why are people jumping on board for adoption for children in Haiti when there are over 100,000 children here in the united states waiting for adoption? My wife and I are in the process and don't understand why it takes so long and why if you are taking a child out of the social services program it costs so much for adoption?

Answer: adopting from social services (foster care) is the least expensive way to adopt. It costs very little or nothing to adopt.

Question: How long does a domestic infant adoption take from start to finish with baby in your home? We just mailed in our adoptin application for the state of Michigan and I am just wondering how long it may take before I have a baby shortest to longest wait time if anyone has been here before I'd love to hear from you. Thanks

Answer: My adoptive parents waited about a year between the time they applied and when I was finally in their home. But, once I was there, it wasn't "finished." It was just the beginning. I struggled, they struggled. I was disappointed, they were disappointed. It's still not "finished" 50+ years later.

Question: Getting started on domestic adoption? How would we begin the process of looking into domestic adoption. We would only be comfortable adopting an infant, as we don't feel that we could handle an older child from foster care. What are some things to look in to?

Answer: The first thing my husband and I did was beging talking about adoption with our friends, family and co workers. We were quite suprised to find out that so many of our acquaintences had adoption stories that we were not even aware of. After talking more about it, we finally decided to contact one local agency that had a really good reputation. We attended a pre adoption group seminar and learned that there is so much information we were not even aware of when it comes to adoption. It's not simple, but very possible. Once we decided that this was going to be our option for building our family, we went in full force. Keep in mind that your home study will take a while. Once that is approved, the truly hard part begins............The Wait. Keep patient if you can and busy, Read, read read! Educate yourself on adoption as well as your family and friends. Keep in mind, they are more than likely going to have the "idea" that adoption is a quick thing. "That there are so many children out there who need homes"...........While that is true, the adoption process is not always a speedy one. There may be bumps in your journey that you didn't even thing about. A birth mother may change her mind, there may be complications with your home study, etc., etc., My main advice is this. Once you begin your wait, carry on with your life. Plan your vacations, spend time with your husband, Go on dates!!! Do not put your life on hold for fear that you will miss that "call".........no matter where you are, you can always get home if that happens. Good luck and I wish you patience!

Question: We have been approved to adopt and I'm trying to adopt a baby. Does anyone have ideas on domestic adoption? There have to be mothers out there looking for a good home for their infant.

Answer: Try going to your local hospital and let the nurses know that you want to adopt and if a mother comes in that wants to give her baby up for adoption tell them to let you know. Congratulations on deciding to adopt. I just had a little girl, and we are thinking of adopting a baby in the future. There are too many kids who need a loving home.