Independent Adoptions

Question: Have you ever used or heard of the Independent Adoption Center? I am considering adoption and trying to find a reputable agency. The Independent Adoption Center (http://adoptionhelp.org) seems like a good agency but when I checked the Better Business Bureau, I found they have 5 complaints between both their W. Coast and E. Coast offices.

Answer: Then I wouldn't go with them. They don't sound like that good an agency if they've got 5 complaints on record.

Question: what can you tell me about "private or independent" adoptions? someone suggested that I adopt a child. I think there are age limits. I'd assume age limits would be through an agency. However, there are independent or private adoptions that involve the parties and a lawyer and no agency. What can you tell me about all that? adoption was suggested as an alternative to surrogacy. I doubt the ones of you who have ridiculed adoption, need to re-assess since you do not know all the facts. The person who suggested it was a doctor. Want his phone number?

Answer: If you don't want to go through an agency you must know some one who wants to give up rights to their child. You do have to have a home study and a lawyer is strongly suggested to make sure no laws are broken. People don't know what they are talking about private adoptions are not illegal as long as you don't pay for the baby. You can pay medical bills but that is it. I did a private adoption and it was totally legal. we paid lawyer fees, social worker for home study and court cost. We did not have to pay medical bills because the woman used her insurance. I hope this help adoption is a beautiful thing.

Question: Does Russia allow independent adoptions? Thanks for all input and info

Answer: If my (limited, still learning) Russian is correct, I think Turkey Lurkey is right: Independent adoptions are allowed for Russian citizens, but not for international adoptions. I believe current Russian law says all international parents who are interested must work through an agency which is accredited through the Russian government. However, in many cases the regions (Russia's equivalent of states) are given a lot of leeway in how they interpret federal law. In years past, there were regions that allowed adoptive parents to pursue independent adoptions in certain situations... but I believe that there are very few (maybe none) who allow it now. Удача. (I'm pretty sure that's "Good Luck.")

Question: How does an independent adoption work? Im talking about when you adopt from a friend of a friend of a friend of another friend? Without an adoption agency involved?

Answer: You just get a family lawyer who specializes in adoption to draw up the papers and have both the birth mother and father sign them as well as the adoptive parents. It is a fairly simple process then the court approves the adoption and changes the birth certicate. But the adoption lawyer will handle everything. Shouldn't be more than a few thousand dollars if you match yourselves. Good luck on finding someone. We have been looking to adopt a child for years on our own, and still no adoption. I refuse to do an agency that takes the money for 'admin expenses' and leaves the birth mother with her electric bill paid.

Question: Can you do an independent adoption from a Non Hague Convention country? Is it possible to adopt independently, from a Non Hague Convention country, or is it required to use an agency?

Answer: I think sometimes that is possible. If you are in the US some states do not allow it, so it may depend where you live. I think that process is more difficult and more 'risky' for the adoptive parents though so it is usually advised that you go through an agency. Here is the govt website on adoption, if you look at the bottom left of the page there are a few links that describe the process for international adoptions from Hague and non Hague countries. http://adoption.state.gov/ and here is a little chart from the website (pdf) that shows the basic differences. http://adoption.state.gov/pdf/Side_by_si…

Question: independent adoption question on B fathers and interstate? Hello all. We recently began the process to adopt an older child when I received an email from one of my best friends younger sisters. She is the mom of two beautiful girls and found herself preg. again and just can not do it. She knows we want to adopt and if she decides (still has about 6 months to go) truly wants to place the baby with us. I will be seeking a lawyer soon but I do have a question. She is completely unsure who the father of this baby is. She lives in Pennsylvania, could anyone tell me the "rules" for this? Advice welcome too! Thank you! Thank you for your continued answers. In terms of finding the father it will be highly unlikely. I am not aware of her background but she is currently married but separated. Her husband is not the father and I believe the baby was conceived in another state and the father could more than likely prove to be an illegal immigrant. As I may have mentioned we already have an appt. with a lawyer, just trying to get some questions out of my head now before I go from someone who has been through this before.

Answer: You need to seek the advice of an attorney who is versed in Interstate Adoptions. This will fall under ICPC. The paternity stuff the attorney would assist in sorting out with you or will give you guidance on where to start. Since you are not related to the n/mother or to the child I really believe ICPC will apply. ICPC= Interstate Compact on the Placement of Children http://www.abcadoptions.com/icpc.htm <-great information/addresses In most state, the legal father would be the husband whether biological or not so his rights would have to be terminated.

Question: How do adoptive parents find birthmothers for an independent adoption? without going through an agency?

Answer: A good way to have a private adoption is to open your mouth and talk to family. They usually know someone with an unwanted pregnancy. My birth mom is my cousin really. My parents couldn't get pregnant and when my birth mom was in the hospital with me the day I was born, her mom, my grandma and aunt, mentioned my parents and they went from there. It took two years for the finalization, but it was worth the wait my mom says. Everything was personal, and she's always been in my life, even though I didn't now she was more than just one of my hundred of cousins. I met her this summer and our relationship is great, I'm so much like her it's scary. So just talk to people you know and through the grapevine you'll find that one lost expecting mom and you'll save eachother. Good Luck and God Bless!!! ;)

Question: independent, international adoption? i am wondering if anyone (from Canada) has done an international (overseas), independent adoption? are independent adoptions more economical than going through an agency, and how do i get started?

Answer: Hi Ray We were in Colombia over Christmas and there was a Canadian couple from Winnipeg there with their soon-to-be child waiting for their final court date. So, Canadians are adopting there. Write to me and I'll give you the contact information for our lawyer in Bogota. She can walk you through the Colombian procedure. Meanwhile, you need to find out from Canada what is necessary to bring an adopted child into Canada as a citizen. It is probably on the federal government's immigration web site. You definitely will need a home-study and you might want to get that started as soon as you can. You should reconsider your decision to forego the agency - if there is one that has practiced in Colombia and is recognized by ICBF, your life will be much easier. This may be a case of penny-wise, pound foolish. Whatever you decide, your willingness to take one of these children out of dreadful circumstances and into your home as a beloved child is commendable. Good luck to you

Question: Anyone who can tell detailed procedure on "independent adoption" in the Philippines?

Answer: What do you mean "independent adoption"? Well, in the Philippines there are two types of adoption. A domestic adoption, where any possible adoptive parents will adopt a child, here in the Philippines; Inter-Country Adoption, where the possible adoptive parents are not domiciled in the Philippines or will bring the adoptive child outside the Philippines. Both have strict requirements. I would suggest, if you are adopting a relative or a stranger get in touch with DSWD because each case will determine what type of adoption best serve the interest of the child and the process to the comfort and ease of adoptive parents. Adoption is a noble act, (whether adopting relatives, or strangers) however, stricter laws are applied in the legal process. Certain physical, mental, emotional requirements of the adoptive parents are carefully studied and evaluated by the case workers to ensure their fitness to become parents. It is more difficult to adopt than to have a baby. But the process just ensure that the adoption is not so easy to encourage not so serious and unprepared individuals and protect further the genuine seekers of children to be adopted.

Question: independent adoption? Anyne know a good website about Independent Adoption Laws In Mississippi and Louisiana? Well that was very rude what do people have against adoption? I'm sorry that your mom gave you up but that doesnt mean you have to but down on the entire adoption system.... I really just want some websites....If you dont want to help dont reply thank you very much Theresa

Answer: Here are the websites I believe you are looking for Mississippi http://adopteerights.net/nulliusfilius/?… Louisiana http://adopteerights.net/nulliusfilius/?…

Question: Independent Adoption Fees- Birth mother? I have recently found that I am pregnant. I am unable to afford to raise the child or really even to be pregnant so I am considering Independent Adoption to a wonderful family who wants to adopt another child. Since I live in a small town one of the conditions would be that I would be allowed to stay in one of their homes at the beach or somewhere else just to avoid the rumors and usual talk when it is over and done. It is a hard decision and I don't need people's opinions on it here at home. but i need to know what I can legally expect the family to pay while I am there. I will continue to work until I start showing then leave. I need to know about things like my car bill, cell phone (for safety reasons), and other bills that can't wait while I am unemployed. Does anyone have any experience in this area or know a website I can go to to find out the Georgia Laws on what they are expected to pay? Please any help would be great! Thanks.

Answer: I never thought I would see the day I would give this answer due to my personal views on abortion. Get an abortion or raise your child. From my understanding paps only pay for reasonable expenses. Your car bill, cell and general bills are not their responsibilities these are yours, they only pay for things that are essential. If you can't afford a car or cell phone while you're pregnant get rid of them. Do as already suggested and get yourself a lawyer.

Question: INDEPENDENT ADOPTION PLEASE HELP? HI OKAY. SO MY COUSIN IS PREGO SHE IS DUE JULY 29TH 2010. I CAN NO LONGER HAVE KIDS SHE IS GIVING HER BABY TO ME. WE WANT A INDEPENDENT ADOPTION. IM NOT SURE HOW MUCH THIS COST. I DIDNT REALLY WANT TO PAY FOR ANY LEGAL FEES OR ANYTHING, I JUST WANT IT TO BE TAKEN CARE OF AND ME GET THE CHILD. IS THERE ANY WAY I CAN JUST DO IT WITH OUT ALL LEGAL FEES? OR ANYTHING YOU CAN HELP ME WITH .. PLEASE LET ME KNOW.. THANKS IS THERE ANY WEB SITES I COULD GO TO. I LIVE IN OHIO

Answer: you will incur fees as you must have an adoption home studyany child. You cannot just have papers signed to adopt, a few court appearances will be needed.

Question: In a Independent Adoption - Which is better to grow through an Agency or a Lawyer? We have an oppurtunity to adopt independently, we are leaning towards going through an agency, but we want to make sure that if for any reason we are unable to adopt the child, then the child can go to the grandparents or uncle and aunts. We don't want the baby going somewhere else, is this an issue when going through an agency - or are we safe from this since it is an Independent adoption and the parents are giving up their rights? Hello, We spoke with a few lawyers and they stated the fee would be about the same $8,000 with our attorney and paying for the birth mothers attorney. Why do people state going through a lawyers is best????

Answer: I am going through the same thing I am going through an attorney, but I also hired a women to help the mother out so i'm not so intrusive. This women set us up with therapy and also takes the mom to her medical care. Pretty much she is just an unbiased person who is there for mom. Agencies seem to be one sided to me and the cost is so much hire.

Question: Independent/Private Adoption - Please read if you have DONE this.? Hi all and thanks for reading. I would like to hear how your independent/private adoption went. (Independent is adoption without an agency). How long did it take, how much did it cost, what did you provide for the mother, how did you "network". Thank you.

Answer: We networked through adoption attorneys. So ultimately, after about 6-9 months the birth mother found us. I don't remember the total cost but I know it was less than 10k. That included lots of counseling for us and the birth mother, some living expenses for the birth mother and attorneys.

Question: What are some of the basic steps in an adoption? My husband and I are looking into adoption. We live in North Carolina. Does anybody know what the basic time line is? What we do first, second, third? Where do we start? We're considering independent adoption of a child from the age of 1 to 8 years old. We want to adopt within the United States, if that helps.

Answer: 1-8 you would have to go through an adoption agency/social worker/state run programs Chances are the child you are looking for will come out of a foster home or orphanage so you would need to check your local area for those things you will (depending on your state) have to apply to become eligible to adopt. this includes home studies, written personal statement, written references from family and friends. You get screened in every way possible (finances, psychological evaluations, criminal background checks, home studies etc). This process takes about a year After you are approved it could take months before your family is matched with a child after you are matched and the paper work takes a few weeks to a few months before the child is placed in your home. And a year after that for the adoption to be finalized. Children in this age group tend to have some sort of disability so be prepared for that too. generally speaking the older they are there is more of a chance they are in some way disabled. I IN YOUR STATE: it is required to take 30 hours training course work before you become approved to adopt an older child. So I would assume this would be included in the 1st year of paper work. The reason this process is so long is that they want to make it hard to ensure that the people who are seeking to adopt REALLY WANT IT. So stick in there. <3 GOOD LUCK

Question: Could Adoption be used as a social issue for an independent learning study? Would this work out??? Thanks :) Ten Points to the best answerer. Thanks both of you just helped me more than you could know :) Now I'm not as stressed thank you :)

Answer: I'm basing an entire degree around it, so I'm pretty sure you can get away with it for an independent learning study. Have some sites to start you off: www.divinecaroline.com/22095/39676-nat… motherhooddeleted.blogspot.com/2010/08… EITHER PARENT OR ABORT! DO NOT ABANDON YOUR CHILD TO ADOPTION! Seriously. Adoption Truth @ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QOZGwqHVn… Myths told the unmarried mother @ http://gift-not-choice.tripod.com/myths-… What you should KNOW if you're considering adoption for your baby @ http://www.cubirthparents.org/edd/index.… Open adoption is almost never legally enforceable! Many parents have lost access to their children due to "open" adoption promises. Read http://lifemothers.com/thewall.html and http://www.bringperihome.com/ and http://www.exiledmothers.com/adoption_fa… and http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/ind… and http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/ind… Taken from Nancy Verrier's book, Coming Home to Self: http://www.nancyverrier.com/self_book.ph… For the adoptee every day is a challenge of trying to figure out how to be, although he probably doesn't understand the difficulty this presents for him. It has been true his whole life and, therefore, feels normal. However, it takes a great deal of energy and concentration. And it never feels quite right. He never quite fits. Therefore he feels as if /he/ is never quite right. (pg 50) Abandonment and neglect are reported to be the two most devastating experiences that children endure - even more devastating then sexual or physical abuse. That's why some neglected children do naughty things to get attention. Even though the attention is hurtful - being yelled at, hit, or otherwise harmed - it is better than neglect. /Anything/ is better than abandonment. Abandonment is a child's greatest fear. For adoptees, it is also reality, embedded in their implicit and unintegrated memory. (pg 102) It is sometimes difficult to spot grief in children. After all, it isn't as if the child sits in a puddle of tears his entire childhood. As one adoptee said, "Of course I played, laughed, sang. Do people think that if you're not sitting in a corner with your head on your knees, you are not sad? I had happy times, but the sadness was always there, even when I was having fun." (pg 117) http://shakespearessister.blogspot.com/2…

Question: Independent Adoption In Georgia? My friend wants me to adopt her unborn child. I need to know how to do this without the help of a pricey attorney. Can I just have her to sign something and I take it to the court house?

Answer: You also have to get a home-study completed before you can adopt. I do not think an adoption lawyer will charge you too much as long as the birth-mother and birth-father both sign off on the child. If the birth-mother is not married then the birth-father can sign off on the child before the child is born...but if she is married then I am not for sure what Georgia law is but they will have to wait to sign off on the infant 48-72 hours after the child is born. Your first step though would be to get your home-study completed. It can take some time since you have to get physical, fingerprints, background check, etc

Question: Can you adopt in Minnesota without going through an agency or having a lawyer? Hello we are looking into independent adoption in the state of Minnesota. Can you adopt a child that is a friend of ours child, with getting just a home study done and no lawyers - just have the mother sign consent? Please any info would be helpful. Thank you No one said anything about being too poor to adopt - Even though the cost is high and thats why there are so many children without homes! A lot more people would adopt if the prices weren't so high! We are wanting to make sure we do our research!!! Thanks for your help!

Answer: No, you cannot. Although you can arrange for a private adoption, you must still be approved by the State of Minnesota as fit to adopt. The same is true in the vast majority of states, if not all of them.

Question: which is more common? agency adoption or independent adoption?

Answer: Agency adoption is more common. Up until recently many people considered independent adoption to similar to buying babies on the black market, though that couldn't be further from the truth, it became a taboo with many people. In recent years independent adoption has become more acceptable but is still not quite as common.

Question: Are there other countries besides Ukraine that allow independent adoption (without use of adoption agency)?

Answer: I was working on a temporary project with an African woman who said she could go to her country and pick out a baby and it would be a two week process from beginning to end. But she was a native of that country, so I don't know if an American born white person could pull that off.