Dowry

Question: Can you tell me a single marriage performed in India without dowry? Dowry is in many forms, sometimes it is indirectly given in the form of property, jewels or jobs with good permanent income of the girl. Most people who are talking against dowry are no.1 dowry givers. Even in love marriage, nobody loves a girl who is well below their status and who has no means of income in the future. In real people talking vigorously against dowry marry their daughters to a well settled boys by spending lot of money as dowry.

Answer: well i am an indian & my parents marriage was arrange marriage. my father didn't took any dowry. & my mother & father never saw each other before marriage. but since childhood i never saw my parents fight

Question: What was the initial purpose of the traditional marriage dowry? And what do you think are the consequences of not having the dowry in a marriage where a woman would be a stay at home mother and not work (much like the traditional arrangement of marriages which used to include the dowry)? _______ Nataly- Yes, I know. However what I'm pointing at is that SAHM's are doing no more work today than they did back in the time of dowrys. So what's the deal now?- Explain the consequences of this..

Answer: The dowry contributed to the support of the family. However, women did contribute to the family economically in past times. The woman's role as cloth producer as essential in ancient and medieval society for instance. Spinning and weaving were the most important female tasks, in fact the word 'wife' derives from the Saxon word for 'weaver'. And giving a dowry was not compulsory in western society. A poor woman whose family could not give a dowry could still get married. Peasant women would often marry without dowries. The economic contribution of a peasant woman was not negligible. The giving of dowries became obsolete in western society many years ago. Women who married men who could not afford to support them generally worked, as they always have done. As far as I am aware, this is still the case. Prior to the Industrial Revolution, most people worked at home, after it most people worked outside the home. But they still worked. However, a modern man who supports his wife at home will, I imagine, consider it money well spent because his children are being raised by their own mother rather than by strangers. if he's not happy with this, then he needs to reflect that if his wife does go out to work, she will probably have to spend a lot of money on childcare, and the may not be any better off.

Question: What is a reasonable amount to give as dowry? I forgot the Arabic word for dowry......can someone refresh my memory please? And what is the recommended amount? Many many people give insanely unreasonable amounts as dowry.....what a waste..... And by the way, I is not planning to get married anytime soon! I is just asking!

Answer: mahr "Also, a narration in Sunan Abu-Dawud (a lesser collection of Hadith, in that it contained some narrations of weaker verifiability) suggests that the mahr must be given prior to consummation: * Narrated a man from the Companions of the Prophet: Muhammad ibn Abdur-Rahman ibn Thawban reported on the authority of a man from the Companions of the Prophet (peace be upon him): When Ali married Fatimah, daughter of the Apostle of Allah, he intended to have intercourse with her. The Apostle of Allah prohibited him to do so until he gave her something. Ali said: "I have nothing with me, Apostle of Allah." The Prophet said: "Give her your coat of mail." So he gave her his coat of mail, and then cohabited with her.[4] " How much should the Mahr amount be? It is unIslamic for a Muslim woman to set a huge demand for herself, with the intention of deterring suitors of humble means. Islam does not require husbands and wives to come from the same social strata or income brackets – although this may often seem to be advisable. Islamic compatibility is based on religious faith and mutual respect, not on money, caste (another Hindu custom), class, background, nationality, etc. It is just as unIslamic to demand a huge mahr, generally beyond the husband’s means, based on the intention of checking the husband from ill-treating his wife, or wrongfully or causelessly divorcing the wife, or preventing him from remarrying another later – the reasoning being that in cases of divorce the woman can demand the full payment of the mahr. The fixing of a substantial mahr for the above purposes rests on the supposition that the mahr has to be fixed at the time of marriage, but not handed over until divorce – which gives it a supposed ‘deterrent’ value. This is unlawful in Islam, for in this case the wife has no use or ownership of the mahr during the time of the marriage. If the prospective husband is not a wealthy man, a generous wife may choose to accept very small mahr, but this has to be her own free choice. She should not be coerced or have pressure put on her in any way. Some of the Prophet’s female companions accepted their husbands’ conversions to Islam, or memorising of ayat of the Qur’an, or giving education to others as their mahr. The mahr has to be fixed taking into account the bridegroom’s position in life. That is, it should not normally be more than he is easily able to afford, whether it be a lump sum or some article of value. Jurists have different views on what the minimum amount should be, but all agree that it should be substantial enough for something to be bought against it. In other words, any amount which is sufficient for a purchase is acceptable as mahr. The husband may be loaned money by his father or family, but it must be repaid. In the case of Nabi Musa (the Prophet Moses), when he left Egypt for Madyan he married Safura the daughter of the Prophet Shu’ayb. His mahr mu’ajjal was settled and paid off by binding himself to grazing his father-in-law’s cattle for ten years without wages. Presumably Shu’ayb had paid Safura on Musa’s behalf. A good woman might agree on a low mahr if she wishes, or none at all, according to the circumstances of her husband. Once fixed it is fixed, and legally binding – so it is good practice to have it written down and witnessed on a document. The wife should take advice on her decision, and not be blinded by emotion, or coercion, or fear, or family pressure. If any person pressurises a woman into a decision she might not have otherwise made, that person will be held to account in the Life to Come, even if he ‘got away with it’ on this earth. One recorded hadith suggests that ‘the best woman is the one whose mahr is the easiest to pay.’ (al-Haythami, Kitab an-Nikah 4:281). However, it is sensible for a wife to accept a reasonable mahr, as this becomes her own property as stated, and is hers to keep should the marriage fail and end in divorce.

Question: What a bride should do when in laws start demanding more dowry and money. What are the alternatives for her? In India some bribes are compelled to bring more dowry and cash and when they fail, they are killed or they are compelled to commit suicide. What are the alternatives for her.

Answer: File a complaint under Sec 498 & 498(A) with the Police.

Question: What is your opinion to make Indian marriages without dowry? I hate this dowry-giving and getting culture..What is the way to eradicate this life swallowing habit from our country..Any idea?

Answer: Encouraging education and job opportunities for girls and women. It's the only way. When men and women see each other as equals, then they marry each other because they WANT to, not for any kind of personal or financial gain. Old patriarchal vestiges such as dowries tend to disappear when parents expect their daughters to be just as educated and financially responsible as their sons.

Question: How is it determined by Indian police the difference between a gift given at marriage or dowry that is illegal? I know dowry is illegal in India now but I know dowry is used a lot still. Is it illegal if you just give a gift like if you get land or is that illegal. What is illegal dowry or all gift giving is what I am asking. Please only answer if you are from india or have direct experience with this.

Answer: Whichever party gives the higher bribe wins.

Question: What is the standard amount of dowry been given for marrying a girl? .......I heard it can be in kind like money, properties (e.g. house) or jewelries......I know it depends on the girl if it is educated and came from a wealthy family, the dowry might have been very big or vice versa or a misconception......Can you shed some light over this issue esp. to those who are involved in this type of culture to clear things out? Does it mean to those who can't afford will be single for life even if he wanted to have his own family?

Answer: 50 000 rs

Question: Can women expect family life after filing false dowry harassment complaint against husband? Nowadays it is a style to file false dowry harassment complaint against husband and family. After a period of time things go beyond their expected line they again try to live with husband. Do these women have self respect?

Answer: can't expect PEACEFUL family life

Question: What can a man do if his wife falsely accuses her in laws of demanding dowry? One of my friend whose marriage is one the rocks, is being mentally harassed by his wife who is demanding 1 crore divorce settlement on the grounds that her father in law behaved indecently with her and that they her in laws harassed her for dowry. This is totally false, she is doing this just to extract money from my friend, please advice.

Answer: Tell him to hire a good lawyer

Question: Is it true that giving a dowry to the husband is still practiced in Russia, among ethnic Russians? I was told by my boyfriend who is Russian, that if he marries me, my parents have to give him a dowry. I answered, "provided you pay for everything later, including the rent and the bills". But I come from a family where the husbands economic status should be the same or exceed that of a woman. Personally, I don't care, but my parents do care a lot.

Answer: Its like tradition. But in nowerdays not so many do that seriously. Both of parents give some presents as other friends to couple. It can be money or stuff for new flat or just a new flat as a present from parents.

Question: How do i ask him about dowry? I am in a relationship with a guy and both our families know about it. Both of us are from traditional families. Both families have met each other and agreed for the wedding. It is planned to take place by end of next year. However i want to ask my boyfriend about the dowry part of it. My family is not very well of. I want to ask him if they want and dowry and try to convince him against it. How do i ask him? Please help

Answer: Dowry is not a part of marriage system. It kills the real love & affection between a husband & wife. Only unprincipled & greedy people demand dowry. Are both of you God fearing ? If yes, they must be well aware of etiquettes of marriage system. Even if you're not aware fully, study on google search.

Question: What is the price range for the cost of a Moroccan wedding, excluding the dowry to the fiancee? Average cost? Refer to the cost of the marriage ceremony itself, and the cost of the multi-day festivities..exclude the dowry (gift) to fiancee..which can be a lot or a language course. By "average cost" I mean for normal Moroccans who have a normal middle income job(for Morocco) and who don't have a lot of savings.

Answer: honey, dont listen to casa;;;shes not reliable look it depends on teh woman and her family;;;;my wedding was like 65000 dhs without dowry;;; women in morocco loooove money;;;;a husband is viewed as a cash cow;;;; hard to answer that question;;;depends on the woman and especially her family and especially her mother;;;;when u marry a moroccan woman u marry her mother too;;;;;i know because my mother knows everything about my marriage;;;;lol;;;;thats how we do it here normal moroccans with normal income postpone marriage, immigrate because they cant afford wedding;;;thats the truth or maybe they find a relative and they marry because its cheapper that way @Casa: Whatever;;;u just afraid of giving a real picture of moroco @100: Do u think I am Asmaa. I hate her. I am not bent karan like her but I miss her coz I got nobody to fight with. Only Casa for now and you can join us too a ould lkaryan lkelb li h'ttak.

Question: Can anybody explain further to me About the function of dowry in the Philippines society? It makes the relatives of the woman interested in the marriage since the dowry gifts are usually shared by the woman in wider kinship borne group. If the marriage seems headed for trouble, these relatives feel enough utang na loob and pakikiramay to put pressure on the bride to endure her husband’s shortcomings. Conversely, the husband stands to lose his whole investment if the marriage collapses, and the since his relatives probably contributed to the dowry (abuluyan) they will bring pressure on him to put up with vagaries of his wife. Thus the dowry contributes to marriage stability.

Answer: i'm not sure if you're talking about the presence of dowry in the philippines today... or before the time of the spaniards... if you're referring today... dowry isn't really being practiced in th philippines there are no exchanges being done before marriage money/wealth are not used to have bearing on any marriage although, if the partner is a bit well off he/she is expected to help to uplift the lifestyle of the family (parents and siblings) of his/her partner, but not mandatory regarding the wife sticking with his husband... it is customary in philippines to make the marriage last forever... man and woman once married in the eyes of God will be seen as one... you've heard of course that it is a catholic country, and citizens are very religious... but not the way they used to... the stability of the marriage is a choice between the two couple... and not by means of shame and feeling of in-debt to someone... but it is a factor... better ask this in the travel:asia pacific:philippines category so that you can have more perspectives on what the filipinos think of dowry functions in philippines.

Question: Is it correct that this dowry is share of daughter in properties of her parents? If we convert dowry into share of daughter, then they shall not be burnt nor they shall commit suicide.

Answer: I must be done.Watch out.Things are going to change and soon men will have to pay to get a girl in betrothel.

Question: Name the Indian State where people at large are still shy of taking Dohez/ Dowry? Dowry, commonly known as Dohej in India, is a sort of material benefit demanded by the family of the Bridegroom from the Bride's family in lieu of marriage. Unless the demand is fulfilled before marriage (in a ceremony like Tilak in Bihar State), marriage does not take place. Northern & Southern States of India have similarity in this aspect. This is one of the reason why the people of India mostly prefer boys to girls.

Answer: There is no dowry system in North Eastern states of India. This is an evil practice among Hindus and others have also blindly followed.

Question: Can anybody file a dowry case on the basis of ring ceremony? my friend was forced to accept the proposal of marriage.Subsequently,the ring ceremony took place,of course without my friends' will. Now he wants to back out. Is there any likelihood that girl's parents file a dowry case against the boy's family, for backing out?

Answer: No, they cannot file a dowry case against a guy who is still not married. He can just return the ring and move on. They cannot file a dowry case but they can file a case for breach of promise, if he has backed out in the last minute after making several promises. You seem to be supporting your friend. If he had the guts to back out in the last minute, he could have been assertive in the proposal stage itself. The entire thing was surely his fault. He just can't ruin a girl's life with his cowardliness.I am sure this happened in India. Well, nice mess he got himself into.

Question: What are some anti-violence strategies for dowry? What are some anti-violent strategies for dowry? How is it stopped? What organizations are helping?

Answer: who gets the dowry? the grooms family? marry somebody who does not demand one. There are organizations in India that are fighting things like so called "kitchen fires".....but they got a tough row to hoe. And families are so desperate about dowry impoverishing them that they will abort female child. Vans(mobile abortion clinics) travel in country advertising "spend 200 rupees now...save 20,000 rupees later" a really effed up tradition.

Question: How much dowry(mahr) would you request from your future husband? I know most of you are more interested in a man's deen than anything else, but it is also customary for the woman to receive a dowry, so how much would you ask for?

Answer: I was just talking about this the other day in a similar question. When my husband and I went to the adoul to sign the nikkah the adoul asked how much I wanted for a dowry and I said 50 dh which is about $6.00. He and my husband both laughed and said that wasn't enough. I told them I didn't want anything, but they were insistent so I said 500 dh, about $60. They wanted me to go higher and I refused. Then I remembered my ring and that it could be considered as dowry so that satisfied both of them. When we left I gave the 500 dh back to my husband. He just laughed and said he knew I was going to do that. He knows that I believe any money that comes into our home belongs to both of us.

Question: How much was your bride-to-be's dowry at the time you married and how did you spend it? OK, here's a question you've never seen in M&D! My wife's dowry was about $50, which we quickly lost on our honeymoon in Atlantic City.

Answer: I am shocked you took dowry from her Eddie.... we give dowry and its very common in India .... my mom gave me 100 gold sovereigns and land worth 1 crore. but he took all my jewels..but i never let him sell my land ... so i have at least my father's hard earned money with me now.

Question: When we are going to celebrate the day for Dowry less Heart Union day like Valentine's Day? Our country still suffers a lot due to Dowry and Dowry deaths are predominant and sufferings of women is adding, No political party is giving a law to the country to prevent this horrible custom of our society Please answer friends.

Answer: Dude r u serious on this really? I don't think so.