Ketubah

Question: Does having a Ketubah means that you are Jewish? I know many non- Jews who are from the messianic group who have never converted but have Jewish wedding and a Ketubah. Does that make them Jewish?

Answer: No they are just imitation. They have to convert if they want to be Jewish.

Question: how do i look up a jewish marriage ketubah on records? is there any way you can request a marriage ketubah?

Answer: TO find a copy of the Ketubah of a particular person, you need to go to eiother: 1) The synagogue where they were married (they generally keep copies) 2) The Beis Din (Rabbinical court) for the city/community they were married in Sometimes there will be a main beis Din which will store the records for smaller ones, and in countries with small jewish communities, sometimes they centralise the records as well. Once you have located who has it on record, you can request a copy though they may require a reason fro the copy and ensure that it is for a legitimate purpose.

Question: Where can I get a Humanist Ketubah for my wedding next year?

Answer: Contact these guys and ask http://www.shj.org/

Question: Where can I get a cheap Ketubah? I live in NYC so either online or in the New York area. I am really trying to find something nice, preferably egalitarian, for around $50.

Answer: Harry's Used Cars down on Second Avenue.

Question: How would I find a family Ketubah? I would like to find the Jewish marriage certificate of my great-grandparents or even their parents but I do not know how to begin the search. Should I ask my Rabbi (or an online rabbi) or is there any specific websites that could do this kind of serach for me.

Answer: Ask your Rabbi, friends and family. Also, if you know which synagogue they belonged to try contacting that shul's Rabbi as well. You might also try posing this question at Ask Moses. (www.askmoses.com)

Question: In what language did the Ketubah originate?

Answer: Aramiac

Question: If a Jewish man marries someone who is not Jewish, what is the purpose of a Ketubah?

Answer: It is considered an integral part of a traditional Jewish marriage. It states that the husband commits to provide food, clothing and marital relations to his wife, and that he will pay a specified sum of money if he divorces her. If he dies, leaving her a widow, the ketubah amount is the first charge on his estate.

Question: Do I need a family Ketubah to have a Jewish wedding? I'm Jewish but my family are secular Jews so they have not married in Synagogues, would I need to trace a family Ketubah (Jewish Marriage Certificate) on my mothers side in order to have a Jewish wedding? I'm a little worried that these type of documents could have been lost during my family's immigration to England and this would prevent me marrying a Jewish man. Any help much appreciated. I'm not getting married but in the case that my future partner was Jewish, which would be nice, I would like to have a Jewish wedding. It would not matter if it was a Reform wedding, not to me anyway. In the worst case scenario (The Ketubah being lost/spoiled) I could always ask my family rabbi to write me a letter. I guess I never really thought about having to prove I'm Jewish before, thank you all who answered, you have been really helpful.

Answer: I would not worry so much about it. Unless you or anyone else has any reason to suspect that you or your mother had a faulty conversion. You would be assumed to be telling the truth about it. In Israel you might need some documentation, but most of the time a letter from an Orthodox Rabbi that knows you or your family will clear it up any issues ASAP.

Question: Best ketubah for Hispanic Jews? Hi, friends. My girlfriend and I are getting married in June. She was born and raised Ashkenazi Jewish; I am descended from Hispanic crypto-Jews of the American southwest. For our wedding we would prefer to use a Sephardic ketubah to honor my side of the family, but I understand that there is more than one Sephardic text. Can anyone tell me which would be most appropriate for a Hispanic Sephardi? Many thanks.

Answer: * U may need to keep the question open - we're heading in Shabbat and a lot of Jews may already be off line (depending on time zones). I'll pass this along to my contacts.

Question: Jewish Weddings- Who can sign the Ketubah? Males only? What makes it legal?

Answer: The Ketubah has to be signed by two kosher witnesses- that means males over the age of Bar Mitzvah- that are shomer shabbos and mitzvot. There are certain minimum stipulations it must have it - such as the names of the couple, the place of the wedding and a few others. It also states that the wedding is according to the laws of Moshes v'Yisrael (a stipulation that carried a lot more legal significance when there was a sanhedrin- as they could use the stipulation to annul a marriage in exceptional situations- nowadays this is generally never used). In most communities they insist in a secular anti-nuptial contract as part of the wedding preparations to cover the legal side that used to be covered by the Ketubah in case of divorce. Edit: Some corrections to some of what people have stated below from the Orthodox Jewish point of view: 1) The women should NOT sign the Ketubah 2) The witnesses do NOT have to be Rabbis, just observant Jewish men (I am not a Rabbi but have been a witness for two of my friends).

Question: what is naom______ad on a ketubah? I saw a ketubah that has naom_____________________________ad on it and my husband and I don't know what it means and what goes in the space????

Answer: You know, I am not sure. Is this online, or in print? Were there any misspelled words? Maybe that was meant to be "name".

Question: HEBREW ETYMOLOGY QUESTION KETUBAH / GET related Get/Ket both contracts or official documents, but what else? Besides the fact that both of these are official marriage / divorcement documents, what does the HEBREW words: GET (divorce document) and KETUBAH (marriage contract) have in common etymologically? Thanks Jason The reason I ask is because of the first syllable in each word: GET / KET. In most languages the K and G sounds are so similar that they may change over time to the other (G to a K or vice versa). I wonder if the etymological root is the same. So far no one has really given a "for certain" answer even though some good details have been given. Thanks, Jason

Answer: The two words have nothing in common, etymologically. The word "get" is of uncertain origin. It may be derived from the Latin word "act" that refers to any legal document. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Get_%28divo… The word "ketubah" is a variant of the root k.t.b- write. It possibly means "written". Edit: well, the similarity between the two words appears only in English. The word Ketubah is actually pronounced "ktuba" in Hebrew: כְּתֻבָּה. The T of this word is the letter Thav. Get is indeed pronounced "get", but written with a different T- Tet, instead of Thav. And actually, the Hebrew "G" (Gimel) is never mistaken with the "K" of Ketubah (Kaf), but with the letter Kuf, that in the ancient dialects was more similar to Gimel.

Question: Ketubah Contract? Can you give me an example of text written in the Ketubah.

Answer: According to the Jewish view of marriage, marriage is a contractual agreement between two people with legal rights and obligations. A Ketubah is a marriage contract that explains the basic material, conjugal and moral responsbilities of the husband to his wife. It is signed by the groom, as well as two witnesses, and given to the bride during the wedding ceremony. The purpose of the Ketubah is to protect the woman's rights during the marriage and in case she is divorced or widowed. Historically, the Ketubah marked a great leap forward in the thinking about the rights of women. The Ketubah used today was written by Simeon ben Shetach in 80 B.C.E. and is in Aramaic, the language used by Jews during that period. At the wedding, under the Chuppah, parts of the Ketubah are paraphrased and read out loud. It is forbidden for Jewish couples to live together without a Ketubah. If the Ketubah is lost, a new one must be written. It has become traditional, since at least the fourteenth century, to decorate the Ketubah as artwork and hang it in the home as a keepsake. text Orthodox I Traditional Aramaic with Egalitarian English I (English is not a translation of the Aramaic.) On the ___ day of the week, the ___ day of ___, in the year ___, corresponding to the ___ day of ___, in the year ___, ___, son of ___, and ___, daughter of ___, join each other in ___, before family and friends to make a mutual covenant as husband and wife, partners in marriage. The groom, ___, promises ___, the bride: "You are my wife according to the tradition of Moses and Israel. I shall cherish you and honor you as is customary among the sons of Israel who have cherished and honored their wives in faithfulness and in integrity." The bride, ___, promises ___, the groom: "You are my husband according to the tradition of Moses and Israel. I shall cherish you and honor you as is customary among the daughters of Israel who have cherished and honored their husbands in faithfulness and in integrity." "We, as beloveds and friends, promise each other to strive throughout our lives together to achieve an openness which will enable us to share our thoughts, our feelings, and our experiences. We promise to try always to bring out in ourselves and in each other qualities of forgiveness, compassion, and integrity. We, as beloveds and friends, will cherish each other's uniqueness; comfort and challenge each other through life's sorrow and joy; share our intuition and insight with one another; and above all do everything within our power to permit each of us to become the persons we are yet to be. All this we take upon ourselves to uphold to the best of our abilities." All is valid and binding. *Bride ____________ Groom ____________ *Witness ____________ Witness ____________ *Rabbi ____________ *Signature lines may be altered at time of order for no additional charge.

Question: ketubah question/problem? I'm getting married in october of 08. I'm Catholic (not practicing, just raised), and my fiance is Jewish (also not practicing, just raised). We are having an a minister for myself and a rabi for him because thats what our families wanted. his family wants me to sign a ketubah before the wedding but I told him from the begginning that I'm not signing a prenuptual agreement of any kind. I told my parents and they freaked out and don't want me signing the ketubah and if I do sign it they want to bring it to an attorney first and they want him to sign an agreement as well. We are both just trying to please our parents...its not affecting us in any way. The problem is that his family are multi-millionaires and own and operate around 5 different companies. Do I really have to sign this ketubah....is there any way out of signing anything? Or is it something I have to sign in order to marry him? Is it really that important that I have to sign this??? Please help...thanks!!

Answer: What is making your family freak out? A ketubah (Hebrew: כתובה ; "document"; pl. ketubot) is a Jewish prenuptial agreement. It is considered an integral part of a traditional Jewish marriage. It states that the husband commits to provide food, clothing and marital relations to his wife, and that he will pay a specified sum of money if he divorces her. If he dies, leaving her a widow, the ketubah amount is the first charge on his estate I don't see a problem with that.. do you?

Question: Ketubah & Reform Wedding Question? But, I have a little situation. My best friend from college is getting married. She converted Reform and is marrying an Israeli, his parents are flying in from Israel. My friend has a conservative Ketubah and she and her fiance agreed that each of them would have a friend be their witness. He chose an Israeli friend of his who will be flying in... and she chose me. My husband says that because we are Orthodox that I should not be a witness because in Orthodoxy men are the witnesses. My issue is only that we are breaking the Sabbath anyway to attend her wedding. We're driving 3 hours before Shabbos ends (after having traveled 18 hours to her state) to be at her wedding. My friend wants two Jews to sign her Ketubah and I'm her only Jewish friend. No other Jews will be present except my husband and I, her fiance, and his family and the fiance's friends. Since we are making an exception once, should this be a big deal since they're reform? I feel, personally, since they are Reform and it's more of a sentimental thing, or art on her wall, that it's not a legal document, I don't see the harm in it, I feel really upset about not being able to sign it.. I don't want to cause an issue in my own home. I mean.. what should I do? I'm really upset. Well, we're going to try to work around it and see if we can find a hotel a few blocks from her wedding. So we may not be breaking it.. but I'm still upset.

Answer: I am heartened that you are looking for a hotel close to the wedding since it is Shabbat and your primary consideration should be your observance even before your participation in the wedding. Truth is, if you are mechalel Shabbat you wouldn't be a valid witness according to halacha. I am assuming that the actual ceremony is taking place after Shabbat is over, otherwise you have to deal with the prohibition of writing on Shabbat, which would also disqualify you as a witness. Many in the Orthodox camp feel that one should not participate in a non-Orthodox ceremony because it lends acceptance to what the Orthodox consider invalid. This is regardless of the conversion status of your friend. On the other hand, having a woman signed on the ketuba would be a clear indicator to any Orthodox rabbi looking into their marriage in the future to ask questions. Rabbis in Israel looking into the status of children down the road will see a woman's signature, ask questions and most probably disqualify the children's Jewishness out of hand based on the non-Orthodoxy of your friend's conversion. Having men signed on the ketuba might avoid that situation, if that is a consideration for you. On the other hand, you might want the rabbis to know because you might feel that the conversion might not necessarily meet your standards of acceptability as well. The ketuba, as you correctly understand, is not a religious document; it is a contract. It obligates a husband to feed and clothe his wife and to support her as "Jewish husbands faithfully do" their Jewish wives. I understand your friend's desire to have two Jews sign on her ketuba. You list a number of people other than relatives who will be there who are Jewish (the fiance's friends). If the issue with their signing is that they can't write Hebrew, English signatures are perfectly acceptable (as long as they sign x son of y, as opposed to first name last name). I think what is most important is that the ceremony be as authentic as possible. While your friend is a Reform convert that does not mean her ceremony should be seen as not authentic. Who knows, she might really be Jewish going back further in her ancestry and this is a situation of Jews (by all definitions) marrying each other. If you knew she was Jewish all along, then the fact that the ceremony is Reform would not matter. She'd be getting married and halacha would dictate two male witnesses. What this boils down to is a simple question, which is difficult to answer. Do you want to do what will make your friend happiest, or what is more correct according to halacha (and possibly best long term for your friend as a Jew in Israel). There is no absolute right course of action. The only wrong aspect I see is desecration of Shabbat on your part to participate. That should take priority over everything (whether in travel arrangements or signing on Shabbat).

Question: Does an Orthodox Ketubah signed by a Conservative Rabbi have any validity? My husband and I were married 4 months ago civilly. He is immigrating from Israel. He is an Orthodox Jew. I was broght up Jewish in New York. My mother is a reform convert and my father is 100% Jewish. I plan on doing an Orthodox conversion in the next couple of years. Before that, though, I am having a wedding here in the states for my families' sake. We are having a conservative Rabbi do the ceremony. I am trying to keep things as traditional as possible so they have meaning to both of us. We are both extremely observant. The Rabbi told me that he could sign an Orthodox Ketubah so the marriage contract would be considered valid in Israel and by the Orthodx community. Nevertheless, I am the type to check on this. Would it be valid? Or should I just have an American ketubah and do an Orthodx ceremony 3 years from now and do the Orthodox ketubah then? I also worry that the Orthodox ceremony will not happen ( money and life getting in the way) and want to make things as right as possible now.

Answer: No. The conservative rabbi is totally wrong. Once anyone would check and learn that he is non-Orthodox they would consider you to have tried to "put one over" and not only not accept the ketuvah but might question your motives. If you are "extremely observant" then get in touch with http://www.eternaljewishfamily.org/ and ask their help in your performing an Orthodox conversion and marriage. EJF will help you and will provide you with documentation that will be accepted by all.

Question: Wouldn't it be worse to have a gentile sign a Reform Ketubah? Even if Orthodox do not sign the Ketubah, and there's no other Jew at the wedding to sign it... wouldn't it be better to at least have a Jew sign it than someone not Jewish? Please, I don't need the "they're Reform so they're not Jews" comments.. it really turns me off. I'm really looking for opinions on who should sign the Ketubah. Hestia, I swear I'm feeling sick to my stomach over this. :( Thanks gurlie.

Answer: Answer: Considering that rabbis in the Warsaw Ghetto during the Nazi occupation of Poland determined that even though the eating of horse was not kosher under the dietary laws in Leviticus that preventing people from starving took precedance, it is my opinion that IF there is no other Jew there to sign the Ketubah than a Gentile may do so AS LONG AS THAT PERSON has habitually treated Jews and Jewish laws and customs with respect. But, as I have freely admitted that I am NOT Jewish, I hope you also get some well thought-out Jewish answers to your question (((((Footie)))))

Question: Jewish friends, a question about a ketubah? I'm engaged, and I was raised Haredi, though I've since left it and Judaism. (I believe my parents went through with a cherem, but I'm not sure.) My fiance is Reform, and he wants us to have a ketubah, and while, as a polytheist, I know I'm an apostate, it is his wedding too, but being raised Haredi, I am slightly concerned, as I don't feel that halaichally, it would be valid. I don't view the ketubah as merely a pretty piece of paper, I know the responsibilities that come with it, and I don't know if he can honestly say what he needs to for a called ketubah, despite the fact that I have (had) a Hebrew name, since I've been cut off. Am I valid in my concerns? I know Reform allows interfaith marriages, but the ketubah is important, and I'm not sure if I'd consider it appropriate.

Answer: This is a question best left to a rabbi. I suggest asking the rabbi who's going to marry you; that's the only authority that can give a proper answer. You may or may not be interested in the opinion of an LOR (local Orthodox rabbi) as well, just to see what the different philosophies are.

Question: I need help combining a Jewish wedding and a Christian wedding? I need help to combine Jewish tradition with Christian tradition. It sounds easy enough but the ceremony are so diffrent I am having a hard time trying to come up with a medium. I want there to be the traditional vows, and my fience wants there to be a Ketubah and all kinds of other things. Can someone give me a way to integrate these traditions?

Answer: I had an interfaith ceremony myself. We had it at a church, which made it VERY difficult to find a rabbi to perform the ceremony. Once we did, we had the priest and the rabbi take care of different parts of the wedding. Before the wedding, we signed the Ketbuah, but separately, so that we did not see each other, which was what we wanted.In the Jewish tradition, the rings are VERY important, so we had the rabbi conduct that part of the ceremony. In the Christian faith, the verbal vows are more important so the priest did that. We also had the rabbi do a wine blessing at the very beginning and said a few other prayers throughout. We were friends with the priest so he did the "sermon". At the very end, my fiance broke the glass and everyone yelled "Mazel Tov". We got tons of compliments on how beautiful the wedding was with both traditions. Good luck! Http://www.weddingistas.com

Question: I just went to frame a Ketubah from 1916, was this a better idea than putting it in a lock box? I'm just questioning, because the Ketubah is so old and fragile I felt that the best way to preserve it was to frame and mount it in a UV/Acid free environment. On the other hand I do recognize that it is a legal document proving my husband's family line and I have heard of people putting them in lock boxes, but I figure if I have pictures of the ketubah then that would have to suffice as the record? Just wondering. I figured in two weeks when it is finished framing, then I would put it in our dining room.

Answer: Personally, I would UV/Acid free it (it can be mounted to roll) and put it a fireproof lockbox or safety deposit box; and then hang a replica/copy in the dining room. You have a family heirloom that insurance can't replace. That's my general rule of thumb.